Satan Rules

Yeppers. More stories from the self-checkout. The best part? Happened all in one day.

There were dozens of people (mostly women, I might add) who have a deep resentment of the self-checkouts. The comments I hear usually range from "these take jobs away from real people!" to "I don't use them because they don't work very well."

And, of course, there's always the idiot (or 3) who stand in front of the one unit that is dark, with signs on it that says, "out of order." Seriously. If there are 4 units there, and 3 of them have pretty lights, moving pictures, and sound, Why TF are you lining up in front of the one that is not only clearly marked, but dark and silent? And why do you look confused when I tell you, "sorry, that one's not working right now"? And there's always those morons who line up behind the person who is using one of the working units....while the other units sit there, basically talking to themselves. Why? I can't believe that I am among the few who are actually aware of what's going on around me (and I don't think it's because I work with one of these beasts. Honestly.)

Early in the day:
One woman stands out because she allowed me to scan her crap, then, when handing me the money, she says, loudly, "I DON'T WANT TO GIVE THAT THING MY MONEY!" to the guy with her. He just rolls his eyes and says, "Whaaaat?" She says again, "THAT THING! THAT THING! I DON'T WANT IT TO GET MY MONEY!" He takes her bills from her and hands them to me, telling her quietly, "It's OK Ma, it's okay. We'll be in the car soon."

and then:
The bestest customer of that day was the woman who grudgingly allowed me to help her use the machine, and then, when I'm saying "Thank you for shopping" she tells me, "THESE MACHINES ARE SATAN! YOU ARE ITS MINION!" and while I stand there, with my jaw on on the floor, she says, "I MEAN IT! SATAN! *points at the machine* MINION! *points at me*" and then she leaves.

Of course, I giggled the rest of the day, and shared the information with coworkers, managers, and other, non-mental patient customers.