A Laundry Proposal

I'm sick to death of folding whites.

The way I see it is this: In the 2 months since the beginning of this year, I have folded, I kid you not, a load of whites laundry every week. That equals close to 400 loads of socks, underwear and towels. (It's like 40 billion in dog years.)

I am unhappy with this situation, and I believe I have a simple solution to this problem.

STOP WEARING UNDERWEAR, PEOPLE!

I know that it's a good idea when the temperatures are in the negative hundreds, but for every arctic day we've had since January, there have been days were temps were balmy 40 and 50 degrees.

It's uncalled for, in temps like those, to layer up as if it's a second Ice Age (or a bad weather-as-villain movie.)

STOP THE INSANITY.

It's not like we need to worry that we'll be in an accident--it hasn't happened yet, what makes you think it's going to happen now?

Besides, if you are in an accident, and you're not wearing your tidy-whities (which I've folded every blessed day this new year), there's less for me to have to clean up after. And, if you think about it, if the jaws of life need to be employed, it's not like that scrap of cotton across your butt is going to make or break the seriousness of what's happening around you.

So, from now on, unless we're going to meet the Queen, be careful when you zip up--you don't want to catch anything important in that zipper.

(Plan B is to wear everything twice before it hits the washer--and that's just silly.)