Ain't no piggy. No how. No way.
I don't care that you tell me the story about breakfast: it's a day's work for the ol' chicken, but a life commitment for the lil' piggy. I don't care how creative you are in making that lil' metaphor be about working in Retail Hell. I don't care how it relates to being Flypaper for Freaks.
And, I seriously do not appreciate being called a pig--no matter how managerially you meant it, no matter how well you tell that stupid story.
No matter what you promise, I know that your promise will Fail me, so, "uh, hell NO, I am not a pig."
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