Slacker

I've been a slacker in updating this blog (and others), but I don't apologize.

Sometimes, you just gotta say, "I don't want to!" and then not do it. So, that's what I did.

What I have been doing is spending an grossly excessive amount of time paying attention my Sweetie and the Spawnlings. I have also been playing Spider Solitaire, instead of checking email, or posting anything anywhere, and, last night, in a determined mood, I went to the PTA meeting.

I walked in, and was not late. I was ignored anyway. Not a smile, not a hello in the bunch. Hard as it was to imagine, the group was actually smaller than it was back in November. And still, nada recognito.

I didn't feel invisible, but I didn't feel welcomed, either. And yet, I was not fidgeting or uncomfortable. I did not feel stupid. I felt bored.

A guest speaker talked about the program that the children, district wide, would have: blah blah blah sexual abuse and it's avoidance. Now, I'm listening, because this is such a scary topic, while being such a can of worms. Of course, I don't have anything to worry about, but the Howler, being the Howler, can be rather like a dog with a bone when given information like this. (She still asks, regularly, about where babies come from, and recently noticed that she and the Toad do not have the same last name, and the Toad calls her Daddy by his given name--and she brings it up, a lot.) So, needless to say, I'm interested in what's going to be said.

After the guest speaker, it's down to business. I have nothing much to say, except that I, for one, am glad that Donkey Basketball was abandoned as a fund raiser.

The topic of the Craft Day came up. The chairperson seemed rather miffed that there was a snow-day cancellation of school on that day, as if the cosmos and the district were conspiring against her. She also seemed to be personally offended by the idea that many families do want the Santa Secret Shop shopping day, even if they keep the craft day also.

She complained that it was a lot for her to do on her own--the entire school, which is comprised of approx 60 kids per grade level, 6 grade levels plus the special ed class. Sure it's a lot, but did you not have any clue before you agreed to do this? Seriously. Anyway, I behaved myself, and kept my negative comments to myself, until she mentioned that she had typed up directions and that each class had a copy of those directions. And that the homeroom parents said they didn't get them, and didn't know about them, even though she told the HR parents when she talked to them.

I had to break into this train of thought. I identified myself as a homeroom mom, and that although I had spoken with her twice, I didn't remember her mentioning these written instructions at all. Luckily, it was an easy to figure out thing, and instructions weren't really needed. I did tell her that the K kids in my room enjoyed making them a lot. She glared daggers at me the rest of the meeting.

They started talking about how little information the previous PTA officers and chairpersons left for them, and that they're muddling through quite a bit this year. "No Clue" seems to be the catch phrase for this group--and while it's not entirely their fault, they know who did this previously, and they should have called them by now and said, "Hey, throw me a bone, here. What did you do last year?"

They don't even have a list of the things that were done last year for fundraisers or anything. Not even for just last year, never mind a list of what worked and what didn't over the years! Holy Moly! And school started back in August, and they're just mentioning noticing now?

They mentioned that they don't even have a master list of parents who volunteered for any of the activities. Ever. I commented that they truly did need that--it'd be the best place to find people to chair next year's events, because someone who has worked an event previously (especially if it was several years previously) might be more inclined to say "yes," because they know what works, what doesn't, who they can count on, etc. I also told them that a list of that kind would also be handy in making sure those people got thanked--I told them of my insidious plan to actually show appreciation to the parents and families who help with the parties. Sure, it's kind of a pain, especially in the wrist and hand, to write 12 thank yous, but I honestly think it made a difference in the overwhelming positive response I had for the Christmas party. I had parents tripping over each other I had so many of 'em, and treats and things for the parties isn't something I worry about. I reminded them how easy it is, as a parent, to feel left out and unwelcome, and a handwritten thank you (or a phone call after the fact) can make all the difference in the world to those who volunteer. I even had one mom already ask me about the Valentine's party.

And mostly, they complain that they don't have help. Sure my parents are Kindergarten parents, but even so, I see that meaning they have a little bit more interest in being there/being involved, but I don't see that as being the sum-total explaination for it. I think the fact that no matter who you are, you've heard at least one story about crappy treatment at the hands of the PTA--and that hand written thank you mentioning your snack, treat or presence at a party can make the difference. (I didn't mention that I told all my parents that I wasn't expecting much--but I also wasn't looking forward to doing this HR Mom gig, either.)

Anyway, they mentioned two things I honestly believe I may be able to help in: they want an activity of some sort to get the Dads/Significant Male Influence (need better phrase for that!) more involved, and they're fixing up the teacher's lounge, and need folding chairs. So, I made a few phone calls today, and then called the appropriate PTA person to let them know what I thought and learned. Now we'll see how serious they were about wanting help and ideas.

Overall, my impressions of them have changed some, but not greatly. At the end of the meeting, I stood up, put on my coat, and left. No one even said "goodbye."